Self Acceptance is one of the most important life skills a person should be capable of.
However most people fail to accept themselves the right way because there is a very fine line between self acceptance and self deception.
Some people get self acceptance wrong by believing that it’s a passive state of helplessness where a person does nothing to help himself while in fact acceptance is something completely different
Here are some concepts that will help you understand the true meaning of acceptance and help you accept yourself:
1) You can’t accept what can be changed: The subconscious will never allow you to accept something that can be changed. Many people get acceptance wrong and use it as an excuse to prevent themselves from making an effort. For example, a person might know that he is at a high risk of illness because of his obesity yet he might decide to accept himself instead of lose weight. You can accept your skin color because that’s something that you can’t do anything about it but if you tried to accept things because you are lazy to work then your subconscious mind will prevent you.
2) When acceptance turns into self deception: A fox once wanted to taste the delicious looking cherries hanging from a tree. The fox kept jumping and jumping but it didn’t manage to reach the cherries. The fox then told himself that it didn’t need those cherries because they would have tasted bad anyways. Many of us deceive ourselves and use acceptance incorrectly just like that fox did. After few failed attempts many people convince themselves that they didn’t want their goal badly.
3) Acceptance is not about being passive: Lots of people think that acceptance is about being passive or helpless but that’s completely wrong. If you failed to get the job you wanted you should accept what happened by preventing yourself from feeling bad but this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t be working really hard to get an even better job. Acceptance is not about being passive but it’s about not crying over the spilt milk while working hard to get a better bottle than the one you lost.
4) Acceptance and the desire to change doesn’t contradict each other : Many people believe that they can either choose acceptance or the desire to chance while in fact both can be done in parallel. You might attempt to accept that fact that you didn’t reach financial success yet but this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t have a burning desire to achieve financial success as soon as you can. Many people use acceptance as an excuse in order not feel guilty about not doing their homework.
Acceptance is a state that makes the person powerful and not helpless
When you decide to accept something it doesn’t mean that you have declared defeat but it only means that you decided that you won’t let one lost battle bother you until you win the war